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Nowhere good baby, stolen goods trading
I met nice ponies and I hoped they could save me
And things would get better if I made bad songs
I entered November and came back wrong
Got craven cravings get a raven raving
In my haven hating I’m a maven maybe
Barely awake, days like crazy paving
And spend nights alone while I’m breaking breakbeats
Face it, baby, this Dith guy is sallow
Tell truth from myth, split lye from tallow
And tell spooky stories and shit on Salon articles
And shut the fuck up, this isn’t a Dark Carnival
Ponycore’s cringe but the mainstays hella dope
Fingers on the pulse but the veins stay varicose
I’m more aware than most.
This is a lair of ghosts.
Spent a month on the grind for nice rhymes
Life’s too short to find the right time.
So I got a lot of guys for lifelines
Fuck your shit, this is Nightmare Night Nine (x2)
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2. |
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(Ditherer)
Got a dent in my headspace
Yeah, fuck the trends, I’m an edge case
Yeah, got friends in my membranes
Yeah, I got wet in the red rain
Giving me a mic don’t go over well, dude
Loco Pommel, what you don’t know won’t help you
Dodos’ corralled and I don’t know what spells do
Oh no, so hell’s loose, Coco compels you
Howl at the moon on the nearest eclipse
And go shout in the school that you’re hearing of Dith
Pale white and I’m tired, I appear in the mist
You’re pretty light on the fire, need a Kirin assist
But if you get trampled, then the horse ain’t judging it
Show’s dead but the corpse stay shuffling
Seedy fucknuggets becoming a dense following
D. the Fussbudget is bumping on N. Hollow-een
(N. Hollow)
(Yokai!)
Yuh, keep my gat pointed ahead of me
Terrorise these ponies terribly, I’m the
celebrity that you love to make your enemy
If you say you value life then you better leave
Got it? Capisce? Me and a Ditherer
Running these streets. No angels here
So stop screaming Mercy. Making me wait
Just to hear out your pleas? This ain’t it chief
(Ditherer)
Left hoof down, I ain’t never had the right path
Chant dark rhymes in a pentagram of blind bags
Get too deep, endowed with witty snakebites
Dead moonbeams scare out the living daylights
But who needs em, I’m partial to satellites
I’m not evil - I marshall the applewhites
Make a cult classic for gorging an appetite
Holllow and Dith put the orchard to bat tonight
(N. Hollow)
Pause with the dope flow, I ain’t even messing with your
Mojo, stabbing out your brain with your nose bone
Oh no, nightmare moon is a no show
So let me take this chance to kick it off like a pogo
Ooh, the redrum flows like the river
I got a picture, lemme take another shot clearer
Bodies on bodies I think the scene is looking grimmer
As I down another colt and pass the 45 to Dither
(Ditherer)
Cracked egghead spit bars in fortissimo
You couldn’t bar me I’m hardy as Indigo
After this I’m gettin hella barmy with mistletoe and
Take a lotta heat for my army of windigos
But right now I gotta celebrate with you fucks
Ooh, plus I gotta spin Slender Mane a new tux
Lewd thrust, go Screwball, become a patient
They’re playin my tapes on the numbers stations
(N. Hollow)
Down for kidnapping
Ain't no chit-chatting I'm a
Sick bastard I don't kiss
Asses keep your lips fastened
For your sun kiss princess
Asking ‘bout the shits I don't
need no ops around you'll leave with
More than just a stitch
Yuh tummy tuck, I don't give a
Fuck leave him in the mud
Organs spill in my foreign
Wheel I need a horror thrill to
Keep myself alive while I
Ride for my life tally
Up my body count it still won't
Slow down when I die, bitch
(Ditherer)
Rap up with old tapes in a sarcophagus
Filly Guide cookies and brains in my esophagus
Then they told me it’s fake, I’m not a zombie kid
Why’d I bite that guy’s face off - he wanted it
Hey Dith, Dith, Dith, you’re a cool creep
You fakes dip, dip, dip for a cool breeze
I ain’t sick sick sick I’m a Thule priest
The Mane 6 6 6 gonna lose sleep
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3. |
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[Hook]
Yeah Cozy Glow, yeah yeah Cozy Glow
No rosier foal than Ms. Cozy Glow
Yeah Cozy Glow, yeah yeah Cozy Glow
Hold the trophy, so bold, I’m Cozy Glow (x2)
[Verse 1]
Magical items shatter classical titles
Master tactical trifles, mad and actually spiteful
Yeah but I’m never stifled, whack, slackin or idle
Got a plaque made of vinyl and backpackin’ disciples
Fuck Purplesmart, all her magic is now gone and
All her best moves only putting me down pawns
Peep the medallion, opportunity’s pounced on
The new queen of smart stuff, let me put the crown on
Friendship imperatrix, fencing with heretics
Going underground just to get with my therapist
Magic’s outta style, needing engines in carriages
Fact that I could weave this whole web is embarrassing
Pretty soon not even an alicorn matters, and I
Hear the way you talk it’s like you’re proud to form patterns
Gnash intense, I’m too clever for your last defense
You really need a better class of friends, my dude
[Hook]
[Verse 2]
Ill filly I’m leaving you defeated and
Hit the cliffhanger like golly do you need a hand? Kick!
Please I’m damn sick,
If you wish I’d been innocent go home and read a fan-fic
Peep the antics - time you accept fate
Nine kids down and it’s five to a checkmate
Keep the school up while I’m running the castle
Your last hope is shit the writer pulls from his asshole
Earth’ll tremble while we purge the rebels
Make friends and I lie and try a Shirley Temple
And when bombs drop I’ll be sweet with a lotta heart
You can walk off while I eat with the oligarchs
I mean, after all, I’m planning to be in office
For a long time, fans’ll get mad at me in the comments
Getting my attention’s a tragedy of the commons
Fuck Dunbar’s number, I had to become a goddess
[Hook]
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4. |
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(Ditherer)
Baklava with a free balaclava
Pop a shot leave em screaming in trauma
Drop to shop you’re receiving an offer
Glock is hot but the cream is Nirvana
Do a slow bake, don’t step to me
Kids buy a whole cake for an extra piece
This electric, G, I’m the artisan
I glaze Mars’s vaults full of marzipan
Big shop, wonder how the dudes could own it
Take shots at a pony with the rules for zoning
Got some old fucks locked in the pantry
Saying that they used to own it (Fuck if I know)
Raising their kids to run the family business
First word was “Dith” while she was clapping a witness
Call my shit D’s Range, teach a kid how to shoot
And you get no free cake if you’re not in the news
Whole pile of guns, and not a serial in it
Kozz and Dith coming with entrepreneurial spirit
Nine times out of ten, a nine hides in your scone
Just desserts just the worst when applied to a pone
Princess say pie isn’t allowed
You can see me take snipes on my delivery route
Drop molded casings til the foes remaining down
On Soundcloud, turn your bones to pastry
(TLT)
If you want them dead, just give us a call
We'll give you the guns so you can show them all
We'll give you anything for whatever it takes
It's an all-out war for a piece of Guncakes x2
(Kozmos)
Here we come, we're locked and loaded
Burst in the building; rock and implode it
Bullets are flying; cock and reload it
Aim for the head and we pop and explode it
Take a shot at rival chains
And rival gangs, their final days
Interrogate them with iron chains
Cycle reigns, it's a minor pain
Yeah, we're the meanest of the bunch
Make up a baker's dozen and we're eatin' it for lunch
Now I have a hunch, hit em with the counter punch
Hit em to the ground till you hear the bones crunch
Hey, no selling us out
Pinkie Pie sure knows what we're all about
All the things you know, all the things you hear
Lemme say something just so we're clear
Yeah, this is what we do
Custom orders that are just for you
Whether a knife, M9 with a little shine
Or something bigger? That will work just fine.
No need for a test, cause we offer the best
So go out there and complete your quest
and plan of action; at full speed
With our satisfaction guarantee
(TLT)
If you want them dead, just give us a call
We'll give you the guns so you can show them all
We'll give you anything for whatever it takes
It's an all-out war for a piece of Guncakes x2
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5. |
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11/01/2016
Getting both thumbs on the screens
Just like he said, we’d see him again with
No CNS, it’s no CNN myth
A man who went double on a full-brain lobotomy
Some camps think it’s a so-fake anomaly
If it’s too good to be true, then it oughta be
Til he says he’ll leave out clues if they wanna meat
Horseman says that he wants the deets
So he trades emails with a vaunted creep
Gets a quest and a test for the dauntless peeps
But he drops off the net and he’s gone for weeks
Somewhere in the world there’s a box buried
Copping the coordinates, top-scary
Three miles in the forest is something vile
In the Scotland cold on the Cumbrae isle
Now they fight against preventable violence
And find near the forest is a mental asylum
A Swedish superhacker is calling the front desk
Social engineering like h-hello, yes
Do you do any kind of, uh, brain surgery
Meanwhile anons get shit into place urgently
Mad dash cash buy tickets on planes, search for things
Packing up big suitcases with merch for weeks
Operation No Brainer’s
Gotta lotta occupation-al danger
Calling it the trial of a lifetime
Two anons gonna die in the nighttime somewhere in a forest
In go a Swede and a trap
Spectators chill, smoke weed in the trap
Go hit F5 again, see if they’re back
Claiming their waifus to keep it on track
Twelve hours later and they’re not back
Sixteen hours later and they’re not back
We’re thinking that we ran through the wrong path
Fuck, do these guys got a contact somewhere
But before we go off the charts
In spaghetti on a phone call to Scotland Yard
The two heroes come back with the box
Jonesing to offer a phone with a lock
It got cracked, there was nothing that special but
They were supposed to go back for a second one
Swede pretended to burn it to force a phone call
But no one showed, we get lost as the road stalls
After all the hard work and all the passion
The thread got pruned cus the mods are faggots
But if you’re in the woods, hold your fibers close
Cus the man’s still out there, wifing pones
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6. |
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(Ditherer)
Beast from the stars in the body of a mare
Or the body of whatever shit it wants, don’t care
Get a little art, now the freak Anons wanna fuck her
Latch on to the ceiling and your heart motherfucker
Thingpone, crawl into your room for her needs
Got too many teeth, too many everything
Drop it on the record like the needle on the blood test
Seem a little dumb, don’t need it when it’s one left
Already hot so MacReady can suck it
Keep the oven on, Anon screaming at touches
Thingpone is needing some loving,
Sprout a few pseudopods, hew em off, keeping them coming
Maybe wanna face that it’s too late
Place got consumed by the greatest of roommates
Hey it’s your new bae, shapeshift shipshape
Stays on your dick - ain’t crazy, you’re dick’s prey
She’ll take any form to find you
Cold out here and warm inside you
Ponies getting trapped in Amber
Past the standard horror waifu
(Doodled)
Drop long like an A-Bomb
with a cape on - it's Anon!
With no safe' on.
Ready to go -
fetter forego -
she like tachyon.
Let her implode,
never invoke -
better stay calm.
Tsuyu can go fuck herself -
Thing brings all the tongue she felt.
No rules waifu -
homegrown Michel.
Bring home ThingPone -
What I helped for -
in the same boat:
we both stay home, play 'lone.
Play more
with my a-hole.
(Wait, wh-)
I wanted some choice.
I wanted dank, not moist.
Not okay, not okay,
I gotta say
I'm more Mulaney than Ye today.
I'm afraid that I'm seeing too much of her palpitate.
Get her off of me; I'm feelin' like latter day
Leo Eighth, Carradine - what will be on my grave?
Feeling too much seething pain to ejaculate.
See her seepin' sebum - semen not seen today.
Clamped down on my wang now,
I'm feeling sick.
This ain't right, this ain't it -
her frickin' lipids drippin' on my dick.
Reached out for help; grabbed a pole, gave a whack.
She snatched it up; ate it whole, just a snack.
I gotta alleviate this shit, I gotta make it casual -
"Please baby, that's not detachabl-"
[actually dies]
(Omnee)
Oh my bad man
Here, I'll get 'em
Cosmic cutie, absolutely
Tearin’ faces, resolute in
Spreadin’ madness, I think you should
Give into it, feel the proof it’s
All around you, lovingly.
See the dichotomy of
Loving flesh and rending teeth
draped upon you, beneath
your skin, now she has an in,
to make you one herein.
Leans close and then begins
To make you two forever twinned.
Inner warmth surging fast
loneliness flying past.
Memory and mind joined
as darkness fades into a point
upon the sky. Rejoice,
future’s bright, your only choice.
Kiss your girl, hold her tight
wrapped in meat, overnight.
Caring skin and caring womb
eldritch love and tainted tomb
Gaze upon unsealed doom
as ancient evil’s foolish groom.
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7. |
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Mirror Pool Cypher
Born from a water womb,
Sisters can watch paint grow in a slaughter room
Stark silence the foe of a lot of loose
Lips, dark violence can flow as the plot accrues
Not a ruse, Pinkie knows she’s the real one
Mayflies lie, die with no appeal done
Time moves, troubles and scares
The bubbly-haired horse who was doubly mared
Others aren’t able to go through with this
You could fill a house with her quadruplicates
Birthed from the chill blue, soon gone back to it
No resolution for the ones tryna laugh at this
Repeat memories, visions of a bright pond
Split inside her mind off wishes for a dive bomb
Eyes upon her back, Pinkie Pie can’t think straight
Others getting zapped, the crowd shrinks eight more
Times in a row, a unicorn horn glows
Trying not to look at it, stick to a sworn pose
Think of who you used to be, eyes pass over
And make some key judgment, time fast forwards
Seem something keeps her holding on
Don’t make them smile, dark night to a golden dawn
Don’t let the blue paint turn into a blue sky it’s
Too quiet, punctuation keeps the room silent
One of the last ones snaps and she starts to plead
Before the speed of the beat of her heart recedes
Swear off of all fun, tight and frozen
And when the sky was opened, there was one
Then her friends surround her, unicorn first
“It’s good to have you back!” Through all the worst
Pull her in a hug and her bright eyes crinkle
“It’s good to be the only one, Twilight Sprinkle!”
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8. |
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(Buffalo)
Waking up to the break of dawn. I'm aching all
Over and shaky from... What am I shaking from?
What am I saying? Why am I at the bakery front?
And this button? It's vaguely familiar but,
I can't recall it. I'm barely all there. I'm scared,
And honestly, I'm lost here all because I..
Don't know where I'm going to finally jog these
Memories straight, but I'd rather ride on a car. See
On to instrumental matters. Why do I got this mental clatter
Just after I stand, cause I'm banged up and I'm tatters,
But it'd be easy to ask if you remember
What happened in September. This can't be all I ever
Grew up with. Everything's busted,
Dancing in the embers of this mass destruction.
Past the junction, looking around, inside and out.
Despising how even a woman and child could die and drown,
Buried in cries and shouts as lives of thousands
Burn up in the sky and clouds. Ignite the mounds of
Bodies just lying 'bout in a pyre as a final respite.
Pay my respect, but somehow, my face is stuck wide with a smile.
My mind isn't made up, but why can't I really make what I'm thinking hide my excite-
Ment, cause right now, I think I might feel like I'm alive again!
(Both)
I can't remember
What happened in September
When everything is gone
When it's dark and I'm alone
It's been forever
Since I could have remembered
Where the hell is everypony
I just want to know the story
Of what happened right before
I became so alone
(Ditherer)
Stuck in a fugue state
Winter comes and he’s functionally too late
He remembers his true fate
G houls stay creeping, soon he’ll lose face, soon he’ll lose face
Under his eyes you can plunder his mind
For the memories of running, abducting supplies
To construct a device
To help ponies leave springtime and summer behind
It’s a punch in the eye and now
Sounds in the dark ask why
He looks up at the char-blackened star-lacking sky
It churns with dust, he don’t yearn for much
Answer what voices in the dirt discuss
He only shoved ‘em to the deadline
What ponies needed was an usher to the next life
And now he wanders the wastes to find holdouts
Even one prosperous place is too bold now
Cus nopony really likes life in their core
They just forget getting frightened of finding the door
Once he has enough to format the parts he
Dictates his story like Cormac McCarthy
No laughs or parties, soul-black safari
Death’s a museum that tore back the artpiece
(Both)
Still can't remember
What happened in September
Back when everypony died
Trails of blood during my stride
I just discovered that
The ponies were defeated
By something really strong
It seemed very weird and wrong
It just doesn't belong
Like it came out of this world
I just remembered
What happened in September
I'm the one who killed them all!
I survived after the fall!
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9. |
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DTF and friends proudly introduce an album that's only relevant for one night of the year. Happy Halloween.
released October 31, 2018
Thanks to N. Hollow, Kozmos, Doodled, Omnee_Potent, Buffalo Brony, Acarcion, TheGrassSaysMoooo, Drixale, and all of the nonpony producers who made this tape possible. Cover art by the wonderful Ani.